On the latest episode of the Easton Community Podcast, President Mike Tousignant sits down with Director of General Managers, VP and Black Belt, Ian Lieberman.
In a longer form conversation, the two discuss fear, growth and ownership over one’s story. We all get handed different cards in life; sometimes it’s about alchemizing all the parts you have to achieve your full potential.
How do you stay accountable for your own life without slipping into victimhood? How do you find the space to have compassion when you’ve been hurt? How do you fill the gaps in the fabric of your story with love for others?
For the full conversation, and to hear Mike cry (and marvel at how Ian hasn’t), listen to the episode on Spotify or Apple Podcasts.
Hard work pays off
Most of the time, the people we admire for their skills, courage and leadership weren’t always this way. To ignore the full story of one’s evolution by thinking they must have “always been this way” is to discount a huge part of their journey and, subsequently, the value they bring.
Ian first came to Easton in 2006, brought in by a twist of luck, location and sheer curiosity. He immediately became a walking billboard for Easton, eventually becoming a BJJ intro instructor, then a noontime coach in Boulder, then GM of Denver and Head Advanced Gi coach before advancing to the Director of General Managers. Along the way he also became an owner.
When he first joined, he was petrified. Today, he has had this black belt for ten years.
[Games of Resilience: BJJ x Chess]
“I think a lot of people,” says Ian, “when they join Easton or any Jiu Jitsu school or any Muay Thai school, it’s intimidating. They’re almost looking for a reason to not do it, to check a box like – ‘I tried, it wasn’t for me,’ and then they move on.”
For this reason, when people walk in our doors, it’s crucial that we show them immediately that they can do it and that they’re a part of the team. Ian’s first experience could have easily turned him away, but because those inside treated him with warmth and generosity, he stayed.
Even Mike, who Ian brought in six months later and who was an accomplished wrestler, was afraid. Despite his athletic background, for Mike – and many others – this stemmed from the ego and a fear of seeming weak.
His ego, which had fueled numerous drunken bar brawls, now had to walk into a brightly-lit business in a moment of complete sobriety and shed everything it’s been working so hard to project. For many, this collapse of identity can be terrifying.
[Why We Leave Our Egos At The Door]
Besides teaching us techniques and concepts to defend ourselves, BJJ (and martial arts) shows us that we continuously reinvent and redefine the way we move through life. Each day provides an opportunity to do so, as one win doesn’t necessarily guarantee the next. If we want to progress, grow deeper in the practice and truly embrace its magic, we have to shed the ego.
In this way, Jiu Jitsu represents a never-ending path towards “better” (never “done.”) It takes a strong spirit, confidence and wisdom to admit that maybe you don’t know best, there’s still a better way and you want to learn it.
This translates into every other aspect of life – a willingness to fail and to be wrong that teaches us to truly listen, not just wait our turn to speak. This requires a curiosity for constant evolution and a commitment to honesty with ourselves and those around us.
[How Martial Arts Changed My Life: Confidence + Community]
The value of struggle
Ian doesn’t shy away from struggle, nor does he avoid necessary truths and tough conversations. It’s part of what makes him such a great leader and mentor. He’s able to hold space for seemingly opposing truths, to see beneath the layers and skillfully navigate their dichotomy in a way that addresses the whole.
Allowing yourself to face your fears, step into discomfort and come out on the other side changed, gives insight into how others can change, grow and heal as well.
This sort of potential is available to anyone, from any walk of life, and an important aspect of truly seeing others comes down to first allowing yourself to also be seen.
Ian’s story reminds us all to honor the entire path, to not discount one’s good fortune or skills as something given, and to embrace the effort behind it. In this way, we can see the work, sweat and struggle that’s gone into honing the talent and fortitude it takes to lead with dignity, ownership and unwavering compassion. This is true whether you’re a student on the mats or an owner of the company.
For more on life, competition and how Ian’s own family’s journey through the Holocaust has affected how he moves through life today, give the full episode a listen.
[Easton Kid’s Program Director Jordan Shipman: Seeing the Bigger Picture]
